wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
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