walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
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