Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
just survived the first fart of the relationship.
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
You were so drunk you coat checked your shoe... Not even both of them. Just one shoe.
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
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