is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
we need to go to the store. i'm tired of having bud light for breakfast.
do you want me to pick up budweiser instead?
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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