so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
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