im sorry i hit your dog last night,,,i didnt even see it
I dont have a dog?
WTF
people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
i just walked in on my sister drunkenly sobbing to sarah mclachlan. its time for an intervention.
didn't that happen to you last weekend?
shut up.
I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
he looked at me and said 'happiness is a warm blanket' then stole my vodka.
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
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