you always know who the new freshman are on fb because theyre always wearing prom dresses
I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
Note to self: trying to grow pubes back = worst decision of 2014 thus far
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
Randomize