The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
chick flicks and taylor swift songs are like porn for desperate singles
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
Fuck off. Since when do you love him??
Since he licked my arm to retrieve the macaroni and cheese he dropped. You have to appreciate that
Can't even lie. Mad respect
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
Decided to stay sober a couple days, learned how exceptionally stupid my coworkers are. Might have to quit now. Moral of the story:be careful where you go sober.
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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