he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
You called me at 3 am and I rode my flat ass bike that I dug out of my garage in the dark to meet you at dunkin donuts for a 10 minute convo about your mother and you didn't drive me home.
you owe me a blunt and a bottle of moscato.
IM WAITING BITCH. ANSWER ME.
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
You know you're drunk when you're apologizing for your asshole at 4am to the toilet. Eat shit habanero bbq sauce, you've ruined my life.
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
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