dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
im sitting in the back of my pickup eating an artichoke. please come find me, im scared.
that was a mass text, wasnt it?
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
Randomize
