Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
Death by dick. An honorable death. Put a picture of his dick in the photo collage at my funeral.
Randomize
