so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
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