drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
kristin has been a bad kristin
I am about to be in my happy place. (the shower with a 6 pack)
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
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