I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
Randomize
