So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
Side note: the physics of a guy my size and age getting laid in the backseat of a Toyota Camry are absolutely staggering
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
Randomize
