so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
Quick, to the slutcave!
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
It's 2 am on the long weekend and what am I doing? Sitting alone in my room eating chips and queso and watching Rio. Fuck I need to get laid.
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
Randomize
