How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
The thing is that despite the high paying career and the increased responsibility, my life hasn't changed that much. Only instead of blacking out on $2 wells at some dive I blackout on top shelf martinis in a suit. Oh and only on Fri & Sat nights. Being 30 doesn't suck as bad as everyone led me to believe.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
Randomize