hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
Randomize
