bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
Randomize