Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
Also, I'm kinda hungover this morning and I need to wire money to my lawyer. So this is what adulthood feels like
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
Randomize
