There was a fist fight in my basement last night at four in the morning, in case you were wondering
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
Sad realization: so long as I use this sleep apnea machine, I will never be the little spoon!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
i've hit rock bottom. Eating pringles and playing taylor swift on guitar in my underwear at 11am on a wedensday morning. Sober.
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
Randomize