My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
This will be the 3rd time you have blacked out and lost your phone only to have some kind stranger find it, charge it, call me, then mail it back to you. Your luck amazes me...
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
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