Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize
