Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
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Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That works. I won't care. I'll be a mermaid. Mermaids don't give a fuck.
Especially drunk mermaids.
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
I sang Sweet Caroline with a homeless man and made him 25 bucks. Redbull vodka gives you wings!
i need to put some appletini on your dick
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
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