What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
I was giving a campus tour, when a drunk senior came up behind me and shouted at the group, "If Jesus ain't your homeboy - get the fuck off this campus!" Looks like his religion course is paying off...
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
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