Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
Defrosting my mini wheats in the microwave was a bad choice
where does the pee come out of this thing
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
As payment for all the times you have babysat me while im drunk, im giving you the shorts i stole from the guy i stayed with on friday night. They're clean. Come get em.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
Randomize