Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
my sisters under your porch take her home
i never realize how drunk i am until i start using people as human stripper poles
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
Putting a positive pregnancy test next to my condoms in my drawer so I remember why I always need to use condoms
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's just a really flattering way of saying, "Yes, you're useless, but you have great tits."
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
Nothing says "happy birthday" like a negative pregnancy test
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