I showed him my bush... on skype.
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
You're just jealous because you lost me and I ended up at another party licking Marshmallow Fluff bikinis off of lesbians.
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
So my parents just watched me pour their rum into a bottle and only add crystal light powder, no water... Talk about being judged. All I could say was "Cortland tricks?"
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom