so explain again why im purple
please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
Apparently the guard had to repeat "you're too drunk to get in" three times before I understood. I guess he was right.
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
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Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
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Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
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