She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower.
Reggie can tackle my bush.
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
She told me she gets scared easily and that I had to protect her. Then I made a condom joke that ended up making her cry... All bad dude
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
Randomize