In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
Her Grandmother felt me up AND paid for dinner. If she doesn't get her shit together I'm gonna be her Step Grandfather.
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
I vaguely remember a pregnant lady reaching for my penis. When was I in an elevator?
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
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