WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
She just used a chaser for red wine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
I consider myself an expert at getting drunk and embarrassing people at weddings.
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
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