Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
A lesson I learned in the hospital....when you masturbate while attached to a heart monitor, it scares the nurses a lot.
this will be a night to untag.
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
I can't put those talents on a resume
"She's seriously grinding on him while whispering into his ear, 'take me to McDonald's.'"
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
Randomize
