i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
I've started drunk signing up for 5ks. Who even does that?
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
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