Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET MY FUCKING CUPCAKES WHEN THE GROUNDSWORKER I HOOKED UP WITH IS LOITERING IN THE VENDING AREA
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
And regarding bottomless mimosas stopping at 1 pm, there was a chick who drove her car into the back of the bar. Blame that bitch, not you peeing in the koi pond.
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
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