You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
Randomize
