I heard we made out
Welp...herpes.
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
Thank God I didn't lose my virginity to that asshole. That woulda been like winnin a raffle ticket for a free bag of dog shit. But with like a really pretty bag. A pretty bag full of dog shit.
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
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