Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
I went on a psycho cleaning spree so I feel I've earned the right to spend the day in bed watching porn and eating sausage biscuits. If you bring alcohol you can join me.
All other girlfriends are inferior. You are the chosen one.
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
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