i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
I'm at the gym. I've taken enough caffeine to feel inspired to be a low budget instagram fitness model. I totally forgot my push up bra though
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