Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
Is there a zoo near here? I need to see some penguins like right now..
I am not bailing you of of jail
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
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