Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
I just used a gift card from my in-laws to buy their daughter a vibrator. What even are morals?
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Randomize
