Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
She posts like 3 statuses a day pleading for pity. Responding positively would be like giving a dog a treat for shitting on the floor.
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
Dude, for your own safety, do not bring that chick home. I'm pretty sure you're going to find a marsupial pouch smuggling a fresh batch of herpes under that hoodie. Bail bail bail bail bail.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
My dad just said "fuck circus"
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
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