woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
