check it out our google latitudes are spooning
we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I accidentally asked my mom for a blowjob because 'mom' and 'molly' are next to each other in my address book.
like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
This is the way my sobriety ends: Not with a bang, but with a whimper.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
Randomize