Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
Things I want for my birthday 1. a Chipotle grade tortilla steamer 2. a new liver
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
Also, I'm kinda hungover this morning and I need to wire money to my lawyer. So this is what adulthood feels like
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
Randomize
