Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
Randomize
