Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
If I ever write a book, i'm calling it "why do i work with fucktards?"
It'll be a good sequel to my other book, "why do i sleep with fucktards?"
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
this is a preemptive text before you call me freaking out: i have your keys and your car is parked safely a block down from your apartment.
you are a goddess
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
She got a boob job, dumped her husband, became a stripper, got a DUI in her Porsche and is now dating her lawyer
I’m making her my life coach if med school doesn’t work out
Randomize
