yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
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Just when I thought this night couldn't get any worse, my dad sang and dedicated Sexual Healing to me at kareoke night.
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
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Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
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