I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
Randomize