I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
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