and then I told her I was too drunk. She started to cry, and told me this always happens to her and that she thinks shes ugly. I pretended I was asleep and then she farted.
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
Randomize
